Day 85 - The stages of running

I'm fairly certain that all runners go through stages when they run. Without fail, every time I lace up those shoes, a number of emotions and thoughts run through my head.

Here's some of those stages I got to, today.

Stage 0: Getting Ready
Somehow, I have to talk myself into actually getting out the door. I have to pick the perfect outfit, make sure my iPod is ready to go, get the GPS watch ready, and if a longer run, strap on my marathoner belt. From an emotional perspective, this is usually me on a teeter-totter. I come up with all these great reasons I shouldn't go running right now and then I just dismiss them. It amazes me that people walk out the door and just say that they'll run however long/far they feel like. For me, if I don't have a goal (really...an ending point), I don't think I'd ever make it out the door.

Stage 1: The first mile
Oh, it just feels so good. The sun is shining, I feel like I'm quite the dashing runner figure (aka look like I know what I'm doing), and I'm just zipping around the city. Life couldn't be better in the first mile. I'm not even looking at my watch to see my time or to see how far I've gone because I could do this all day. My music is pumping me up and all is well with the world.

Stage 2: The slow-down
I surreptitiously start checking my watch and am shocked at how long it takes for a tenth of a mile to tick down. I'm impressed that I was running faster than a 9 min mile, but then I start to wonder if maybe I was going too fast and now I'm spent? I will myself by sheer force not to stop running and to keep going. Now, I'm flipping through music on my iPod trying to find a song that is great to run with and of course, not having much luck.

Stage 3: The half-way point
A very dangerous point because now you're headed back for home and while most people would get excited about being in the home stretch, my non-runners psyche starts to tell me that I already worked hard enough and did a good enough job, so now I can just coast. Here is the lazyness that I didn't know I really had.

Stage 4: Sprints/the end....
I try to reason with a body that wants to give up and a mind that subconsciously does too. I make internal deals with myself....i.e. if you run hard for two minutes, you can walk for 30 seconds. Or, just run until the song is over. This, in my opinion, is pretty weird because really, who negotiates with themselves??? It's almost like the angel and devil are both sitting on my shoulder and trying to see who will win.

And that's the diary of a complete non-runner.

If I was a real runner, here's what my diary would have been like this AM, instead of having my mind completely clouded over with the above....

"Wow, it's so great to be outside this morning. I feel so happy to be able to be out and about on a beautiful morning. It's wonderful to be able to explore the city on foot and to run by all these neat little pubs and cafes that we've never tried. Oh, that one looks like a fun place to take Kyle on a date. Look at those men working so hard already over there. And look, there is a little Japanese lady at the waterfront doing tai chi. I think I'd like to get into tai chi to be more relaxed. How lovely my life is and how wonderful it is to be running right now"

Hmmmm.....how do I get to that point? Or even get to a point where I can think about things and clear my head while running vs the obsession with "getting through it".

I know it sounds like I went out and ran a marathon this AM....but 2.5M was more than enough when I haven't ran since May. 3 months of zero running is not exactly the best platform to start from.

In more positive news, I ordered my very own Abmat to do 15 lb weighted sit-ups, which should really help with some core strengthening. That is one thing that I do have in all of this crazyness - at least I currently am stronger and have more muscle in my arms and stomach than I have ever had (well, at least since the end of college).

Day 1 is complete for this 49 day trial.